Oldest or Youngest
by Constalina
Summary: Gakuto goes around asking everyone if it's better to be the oldest sibling, or the youngest.


**Author's note: **Lalalalala… PP: Sliver, Acrobatic

_At Hyoutei…_

"Being the eldest child is HORRIBLE!!" wailed Gakuto, banging his head on the wall. Shishido, Oshitari, Ootori, and Hiyoshi stared at him. Jirou was busy running laps for 'sleeping on ore-sama in a weird position'. Anyway, they glared at him.

"Horrible? You're lucky! My brother makes me do all his chores!" snapped Shishido.

"My sister always tries to put me in disgusting suits," said Oshitari. "They always seem to be fluro coloured…" He shivered slightly, before reading again.

"My sister tries to make me wear dresses," said Ootori, blushing. Shishido smiled dreamily.

"Ootori in a dress…" he muttered. Ootori turned a deeper red.

"PERVERT!" screamed Gakuto.

"AT LEAST I DON'T TRY TO TAKE NAKED PICTURES OF HIM! LIKE WITH WHAT YOU DO WITH KIKUMARU!"

"WHAT?! I thought those were private…"

"PRIVATE?! YOU SHOWED EVERYONE PERVERTED PICTURES OF KIKUMARU LAST MONTH!"

"SHUT UP, COOKIEHEAD!"

"What the hell? Isn't that what Kikumaru says?"

"I AM NOT COPYING KIKUMARU! I AM SEME OF THE ACROBATIC PAIR!"

"Gakuto is currently suffering from fanfictioning fever. Please return tomorrow when he will be normal," said a grumpy Jirou, entering the room, clothes ripped.

"Akutagawa-sempai! What happened to you?" cried Ootori.

"Gekokujyou," said Hiyoshi.

" I was starting to wonder why you weren't talking," said Shishido to Hiyoshi.

"… Why?"

"You didn't say…!"

"Gekokujyou." Hiyoshi was smirking.

"… Okay, now I know you're trying to piss me off."

"The fangirls tried to dissect me," said Jirou.

"Oh…" said Gakuto. He leant over to Oshitari. "What…?"

"It means to cut open," said Oshitari, not looking up.

"Cool! Can I dissect you?" asked Gakuto, jumping up and down.

"No. So anyway, you're talking about siblings?" asked Jirou.

"Yeah! Being the oldest is the worst!" yelled Gakuto. "I have to do everything for my siblings! It SUCKS!"

"Shut up! Youngest is worst!" screamed Shishido.

"Oldest!"

"Youngest!"

"Oldest!"

"Youngest!"

"Cookie!"

"I don't really care, because I'm in the middle, but why don't you do a survey?" said Jirou, yawning. Gakuto's chibified eyes activated.

"Cool idea! I need pen and paper!" he said, running out of the room.

"You had to suggest that didn't you, Jirou?" asked Oshitari. "Jirou?" Jirou was curled up, hugging his Marui Bunta plushie.

_Later…_

"Okay," said Gakuto. "Two votes for older. Four votes for younger. Two for 'I don't give a cookie's ass'."

"Who's in 'I don't give a cookie's ass'?" asked Ootori.

"Jirou and Atobe," said Gakuto flatly. Shishido smirked.

"Youngest wins," he said. Gakuto scowled.

"NOT FAIR! IT DOESN'T PROVE **COOKIE CRAP**!" he screamed, and then he walked outside.

"Where are you going, Gakuto?" asked Shishido.

"Seigaku."

_At Seishun…_

"Mukahi-san? Why are you here? We haven't scheduled any practice sessions with you…" said Oishi.

"SHUT UP EGGHEAD!" roared Gakuto. One of the buldings collapsed. The other Seigaku regulars came to see what had happened.

"What is…? Hyoutei?" asked Momo. "What the hell are you doing here?"

"Maybe they're here for a beating," said Echizen, smirking.

"No, nothing like that," said Ootori, "Mukahi-sempai has a survey…"

"Survey? What's a survey, nya?" asked Eiji, appearing behind Oishi.

"Oh COME ON! Even Gakuto knows that!" yelled Shishido.

"Are they cookies?" asked Eiji.

"NO!"

"Gekokujyou," said Hiyoshi.

"ANSWER DA QUESTION!" roared Gakuto. Another building collapsed.

"Please stop screaming!" cried Oishi.

"What Gakuto wants to ask is, 'Is it worse to be the older sibling, or the younger?" said Oshitari.

"Easy, younger is worse," said Echizen.

"Saa, I'm in the middle," said Fuji. "I can't say."

"I can't say either, although…" said Inui.

"We don't need a freaking percentage of how many people prefer younger or older!" screamed Shishido.

"Older," said Kaidoh.

"Older," said Taka.

"Younger, of course, nya!" said Eiji.

"What? You traitor!" yelled Gakuto.

"Give me a break you hyperactive moron! I have TWO older brothers, and TWO older sisters!"

"I'm not the only hyperactive moron here!"

"Strangely, I agree," whispered Echizen.

"That cookie is!" yelled Eiji.

"WHAT?! I didn't mean the cookie!" screamed Gakuto.

"Then what did you mean?"

"I meant… Oh forget it!"

"What's an 'oh forget it'?"

"FORGET IT!" Another building toppled.

"Older," said Momo.

"Older," said Oishi. Gakuto hopped over to Tezuka.

"What about you?" he asked. Tezuka didn't reply. "Okay, I'll place you in the 'I don't give a cookie's ass' section."

"Gekokujyou," said Hiyoshi.

_In the train…_

"Okay, that's six for Older, six for Younger, and five for 'I don't give a cookie's ass'," said Gakuto.

"You need to get rid of 'I don't give a cookie's ass' section, you know?" said Shishido.

"Where is this train going?" asked Ootori.

"Rikkai," said Gakuto.

"Why Rikkai? Why not another school in Tokyo?" asked Oshitari.

"Because they're part of the triangle," said Gakuto.

"Gekokujyou," said Hiyoshi.

"SHUT UP!" screamed Shishido.

_At __Rikkai…_

"ANSWER THE SURVEY!" roared Gakuto right at Yagyuu's face. Yagyuu jumped, because Gakuto came seemingly out of nowhere.

"… Excuse me?" asked Yagyuu.

"Did a bomb explode?" screamed Kirihara, the other Rikkai regulars following him. "Aww… It's just Hyoutei."

"And what can we dedicate this sudden appearance to?" asked Yukimura.

"ANSWER THE SURVEY!" roared Gakuto. Strangely, the screaming didn't affect Rikkai's buildings.

"… Okay…" said Marui. "Oh, Jirou's not here." He sighed in relief.

"Why are you happy? Did you think you're too fat for your fans?" asked Niou.

"I AM NOT FAT!"

"Says you."

"ANSWER THE SURVEY!" screamed Gakuto.

"We don't even know what the survey's about," said Yukimura.

"If it's worse to be the older sibling, or the younger," said Oshitari.

"Older," said Yagyuu.

"Younger," said Yanagi.

"Man, younger definitely," said Kirihara.

"No idea," said Jackal.

"God, older. What kind of question is that?" said Marui.

"Older," said Yukimura.

"Don't care," said Niou.

"Older," said Sanada.

"Oh my God! Sanada actually answered!" said a shocked Gakuto.

"Just count the freaking tally!" snapped Shishido.

"Okay. Nine to older, nine to younger, seven to 'I don't give a cookie's ass'."

"What was the last one?" asked Kirihara. Gakuto looked sickened.

"WHAT?! IT'S A TIE!" he roared. Frustrated, he went over to a wall, and smashed his head on it. He repeated again and again, screaming "WHY?!"

"Do you want drinks?" asked Yukimura.

"Sure," said the other Hyoutei regulars.

"… Hiyoshi spoke…" said Marui.

"I know! He just won't admit it!" yelled Shishido.

"Gekokujyou," said Hiyoshi. Yukimura giggled.

"Oh, this will be fun," he said.

**Author's note: **I don't really know why I wrote that… 'Shishido' is fun to write. 'Akutagawa' is a pain in the ass to write.


End file.
